Super Bowling
So i'm watching the super bowl, and it's the pregame show and it's a bunch of goofy little mini-docs about old superbowls and stuff. then all of a sudden there comes on this creepy thing about the iran hostage crisis. Out of the blue right after a Ditka sketch with George Wendt we fade out and it's the late 70's and the arabs, persians, brown people are going nuts. it's got an old hostage showing his grandson the blindfold they made him wear and telling scary stories about the crazed mooslims who held him at gunpoint. And the grandpa narrator voice comes in over footage of shiite mobs burning flags talking about christmases missed in captivity and how the evil ayatollahs wouldn't listen to that whiny Jimmy Carter. Then. Boom. It's Ronald Reagan, strong and beautiful and American as fuck and the hostages are coming home. And the first thing mr. hostage does in his hospital bed is watch the super bowl (Oh yeah, i knew they'd have to tie it back into football sooner or later) and he can feel the Amuricanness seeping back into his bones. And now wait! there he is, skinny and old and bearded and looking dazed sitting in the stands today with a stupid prop hat on his head. Never again, mr. hostage. Right after this awesome and righteous footballing we will take over a couple more countries so that no grandpas will ever have to wear nasty muslim blindfolds ever again!
ABC gives me the creeps. Disney, ESPN. It's all a creepy fascist death cult designed to breed Republican jock sports fans from birth so they'll root on nuclear war from their Lay-Z-Boys.
Go Steelers. It's the Rust belt vs. the dot-com busters. Which side are you on?
-pardon my wacky capitalization. my shift key is acting goofy.
ABC gives me the creeps. Disney, ESPN. It's all a creepy fascist death cult designed to breed Republican jock sports fans from birth so they'll root on nuclear war from their Lay-Z-Boys.
Go Steelers. It's the Rust belt vs. the dot-com busters. Which side are you on?
-pardon my wacky capitalization. my shift key is acting goofy.
posted by E at 12:57 PM
2 Comments:
Football is corrupt. It seemed like the refs were totally paid off. The Seahawks got screwed. Both teams were good, but even the commentators pointed out that the score didn't reflect the game in the first half. I'm livid. I honestly don't know if I can watch football again. Granted, the Steelers had great moments, but the Hawks were robbed of some touchdowns due to clearly bogus calls. I get it, the Steelers have a more marketable fanchise. Oh, and that neutral teritory thing is bullshit, 90% of that crowd was yellow. I call bull shit! This wouldn't happen in b-ball.
The crowd was 90 percent yellow because it was in Detroit. It's called friction of distance. The calls were wack. You got robbed. You could tell the fix was in from the start
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